When Sheep Just Don't Cut It

I've always had issues sleeping. It usually takes me between 1 and 2 hours to get to sleep. If there is stress or excitement it could just be a battle all night. You'd think I would have tried the gamut of sleep aids by now, but actually have hardly delved.

The reason for this is that I have a distrust for drugs. It took me years to start taking asprin for aches and headaches, I had always opted for just dealing with the pain. I tell people that I get too drowsy the next day when I take sleep aids, but in actuality this is just the theory I have and I don't know if it's true. I did try melatonin for awhile, but heard something negative about it somewhere and stopped using it.

The thing is that I truly believe my sleep issues could be solved through naturopathic means, both herbs and diet. The problem comes from my inability to put these into play. When trying to solve health issues by natural means, it takes time and determination. You can't pop a pill and make it go away, you have to stick to it and live with the discomfort for awhile before you can even expect any sort of change.

So since I don't have the stamina and willpower for a natural approach, but I don't believe in taking drugs for it, I do nothing and am plagued with insomnia and low energy from it.

It's absurd, I know. The worst part is that I tend to use this model of thinking in many areas of my life. I end up locking into a state of inaction rather than taking an action that I believe in but find difficult or easy but immoral.

I suppose this is why I find the self-help phrase "knowing is half the battle" so frustrating. Knowing, in my case, does squat. And may even be detrimental, since if I didn't think about it I would probably just take the easy way and move forward.

With that, I'll make another attempt at sleep. And tomorrow I will break down and get some Advil PM, goddamnit.